fighting on the terraces

[lesbos]

who oh why have they banned me from the billericay forum? have you urchins seen the back page of tonights echo,thats right i refer to the story about billericays fear that the swansea hooligan element will spoil their big day.it would indeed be terrible if a bunch of thugs ruined the family atmosphere at the match,me and cousin mick are going with a couple of forged tickets and i pray that theres no fighting on the terraces but as a precaution were both going tooled up.Mick always carries a stanley knife with him everywhere he goes and im taking a knuckle duster and some CS gas,dont get me wrong were not looking for trouble but if it goes off we wont be turning the other cheek.im the nicest bloke in the world me but i can turn nasty when ive had a drink,take uncle urchin he sounds like a pleasant enough chap but if i caught him eyeing up my bird ill fecking glass him,what about you cantos i aint got a problem with you but you spill my pint i'll fecking deck you, i dont want no hassle with urchinmentalist but if he p!sses in my soup hes a fecking dead man.as i say lets just hope its a good match at new lodge and theres no ultraviolence from the swansea thugs.

[cantos]

Fair comment Richard.

 

As a precaution i suggest you don't have any soup as there is nothing Urchin Mentalist likes more than to dangle his John Thomas in other peoples soup.

[Kel]

His John Thomas once got lost in a bowl of mushroom soup.

[cantos]

I think Richard is talking about cocka-leekie soup.

[lesbos]

if these swansea idiots are determined to start aggro im just wondering if we shouldnt strike first and catch them by surprise,my nephew wayne is going to let the tyres down on their coaches, my uncle franks thinking about going down there with a crowd from the working mens club,frank used to go drinking with the krays he could tell you young feckers a few stories.

[cantos]

How is the ticket situation Richard?

 

I have 100,and i can do a deal if Uncle Frank has got any Daniel O'Donnell tickets.

[lesbos]

no my cousin mick is going to forge a couple of hundred,either that or i'll give the turnstile operator a backhander.Theres some idiot on the swansea site now talking about bringing a shooter to the match, this is getting fecking out of hand!!

[Hornchurch "O"]

Tie sheep to every lamp post.

This will keep the Swansea fans busy.

[Diz]

That will have the 'ricay fans mesmerised.

We all know they like a spot of dogging.