Being a Man !

[Big J R]

Just the facts about being a man:

 

 

1. Your ass is never a factor in a job interview.

 

2. Your orgasms are real. Always.

 

3. Your last name stays put.

 

4. The garage is all yours.

 

5. Wedding plans take care of themselves.

 

6. You never feel compelled to stop a friend from getting laid.

 

7. Car mechanics tell you the truth.

 

8. You don't give a rat's ass if someone notices your new haircut.

 

9. Hot wax never comes near your pubic area.

 

10. Same work. More pay.

 

11. Wrinkles-add character.

 

12. You don't have to leave the room to make emergency crotch adjustments.

 

13. Wedding Dress £1,000; Morning suit rental £100.

 

14. If you retain water, it's in a canteen.

 

15. People never glance at your chest when you're talking to them.

 

16. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

 

17. One mood, ALL the damn time.

 

18. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds.

 

19. A five-day vacation requires only 1 suitcase.

 

20. You can open all your own jars.

 

21. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

 

22. Your underwear is £5-00 for a three-pack.

 

23. If you are 34 and single, nobody notices.

 

24. You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger's seat.

 

25. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

 

26. You can quietly watch a game with a friend for hours without ever thinking, "He must be mad at me !"