'Scum Derby' predictions

[Ryan.c]

('Scum Derby' - as described in C****y's official matchday programme against Kingstonian. Also not forgetting the two other times we have been called 'Scum' in the same publication!). Seeing as both teams need a win, I'll plump for a 10-0 win to the 'Ricay. Davidson, Parmenter and Brennan all to get sent off, Jeff to get stuck in the dug-out and Canvey supporters to sing something other than "Yellows". Alright I've gone a bit too far on the last one! C'MON YOU BLUES!

[Simon BTFC]

Felt we needed a win on saturday to take some confidence and momentum to scummy island. So Billericay to lose 4-3 after taking a 3-1 lead through Roy (2) and Mooro. We then have a man sent off before C*nv*y score 3 goals in the 18 minutes of injury time the ref finds (afterwards he claims they were compensation for the recent games where we've been short changed by refs blowing up early).

[Guest]

How about - Canvey win on a technicality because the team and supporter does not turn!

or

Canvey win due to no one turning up because Calder is still at home eating turkey and says if the team cant be bothered to put the effort in neither can I and then Cum on Ricay writes the match report and gets awarded the 'Reporter of the Year'

[Guest]

How about - Canvey win on a technicality because the team and supporter does not turn up!

or

Canvey win due to no one turning up because Calder is still at home eating turkey and says if the team cant be bothered to put the effort in neither can I and then Cum on Ricay writes the match report and gets awarded the 'Reporter of the Year'

[rich sparkes]

how about canvey win 3-1 cos there just so much better

[Guest]

your talking b*ll*cks now!

[jl]

i confidently predict that there will be more sand on the pitch than the average spanish resort but the game will survive a last minute pitch inspection as fat jeff bungs the ref a good sum to ensure he gets his only decent home gate of the season despite the fact you can t tell where the pitch ends and the thames estuary starts. in an act of christmas cheer all supporters will be allowed to get in for only 9 pounds and be charged a minimum of 2.30 for a pint of piss.

 

in the game brennan will start at 12.40 as its taken him that long to run from the touchline to the centre circle but its 0-0 at half time. the officials are late arriving for the second half and there appears to be wads of money stuffed down their uniforms..and its no surprise that ca***y sneak a winner in the 12th minute of injury time with riccay down to 8 men at which point fat jeff shows his belly to the visiting fans in traditional festive manner.

 

the only relief for the travelling support is that as they clear canvey way on their way back to civilisation the island sinks after a downpour of light drizzle and is never seen again

[BTFC Martin]

If its a scum derby, doesn't it mean both teams are scum?

 

As for prediction, if we win Calder will claim the success was down to him and if we lose it was the players fault.

[Guest]

The only thing Calder will claim will be his pay cheque..

Can only see Canvey giving you lot a football lesson.

What a load of rubbish your team looked. Ho ho ho.

[Guest]

piss off back to your own board and carry on the conservation amongst yourself (thats if you've got one seeing as there were only 3 of you at New Lodge). Failing that, go play in the traffic.

[CANV EFM]

its THE scum derby for both of us this year .. not to sure i like your new relationship with the motormen.. i trust you wont forget us for your new frds!!!

[Basil-Don]

Well I know there will be at least 2 of your fans there.

Cum on ricay and his interpreter.

[Guest]

Why is that then Basil-Don - for the life of me I can't see aliens landing in Billericay twice!!

I do like the way you get the better of the Ricay supporters just as we did their team.

Just keep motoring Ho ho ho!!

[Ryan.c]

Merry Xmas 'U R Great'. I hope Santa brings Ford Utd another fan, so you can both talk about your irrelevant club.

[Guest]

Hi Canv - I dont think we will steal your old foe, we are tougher on them than you lot, they won't be able to cope with us.

If they play the same against you lot as they did us, your team are in for a stroll in the Park forgive the punnnnnn. Ho ho ho!!

Merry Xmas to all non league supporters; even Ryan.C who had aligator sandwich today and not turkey! snap, snap!!

[Simon BTFC]

Meanwhile in a muddy corner of barkinside, ford's game is cancelled due to lack of interest (sorry, waterlogged pitch).

[Guest]

The Lord took pity on the fearfull supporters of Billericay and granted their wishes, when torential overnight rains washed the game out at Park Lane allowing Billericay time to regroup after their shock defeat by the Motormen. Ho ho ho.

Billericay spoilt children once again!!!

[Gareth J]

However, it's funny how despite overnight rain it took until 20 minutes before kick-off to call it off. That sounds to me like you bottled it!!

[Guest]

Mmmn really don't think that one applies to me chum. What I would summise from that though is, you have never helped out at the Lodge on match days when there is surface water around.

If I know the Canvey set up they had a few dozen there this morning in an attempt to get the game on and would say that it was all down to the ref in the end.

Its just that sort of attitude from the likes of you that I am on here so much lately. I reckon the Shot are right in their assessment of you lot.

Finally, get your head around this, motormen, motormen; Doohh