If football clubs were totty....

[The Truth]

Fulham - Charlotte Church: Proof that money can't buy you class. But could look more attractive if the Welsh bloke was given the elbow.

 

Birmingham - Pamela Anderson: Used to look good in the cups but now a declining force. Plus millions of people watched them get a good seeing to.

 

Wigan - Davina McCall: Poor attendances confirm they've been promoted above their ability.

 

Portsmouth - Girls Aloud: Only one real class act among the hastily assembled line-up. You shouldn't like them but admit it, you've sneaked the occasional admiring glance.

 

Sunderland - Kerry Katona: Once the people's favourite but now an embarrassment. Fun while it lasted - now disappear from where you came, please.

 

Spurs - Keira Knightley: Undeniably easy on the eye with an attractive English spine. And proof that two little ones up front needn't be a drawback.

 

Everton - Dannii Minogue: The poor relation to the more glamorous sibling. Can anyone remember when it was they were supposed to be any good?

 

Arsenal - Jordan: Were more likeable when they weren't packed out with expensive foreign implants.

 

Newcastle - Jodie Marsh: Impressive front two but embarrassing at the back. Had surgery but need a lot more work to compete at a higher level.

 

Aston Villa - Dido: Bland, boring and still trading off the one big hit they had years ago.

 

Liverpool - Sophie Ellis-Bextor: Individually all the components look great but stick them together and it just doesn't work.

 

Chelsea - Rachel Stevens: You'd rather just watch them than listen to all that painful whining.

 

Bolton - Clare Balding: You wouldn't. Not even if they were the last team on earth

[Harry J Allstars]

Gravesend & Nortrhfleet - Kyle Minogue: Once great then fell away into the unknown. Regained the spotlight over the last couple of years but just recently haven't shown any value.

[GNFC til i die]

this was in the sun one day this week, bit late on the uptake.

[Hirsty]

Sheffield Wednesday - Joanna Lumley - had better days but you always hope for one last push to the top !

 

Cheers,

 

PS......I like Joanna Lumley !! ( but the I am an old git .....but you can't argue with class ....hers , not mine !!!!)

 

<img src="/forum/images/graemlins/pipe.gif" alt="" />

[Rainham Bob]

Canvey Island- Daniella Westbrook.

Everything about them gets up your nose!

[Hirsty]

Like that one RB........

 

Cheers,

[Slartibartfast]

York City = Joan Collins used to be a 'proper' bird years ago but well past her best now. <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

[Rainham Bob]

Stevenage Borough= Paris Hilton

Both got irritating lap dogs!