THE DEATH OF COMMON SENSE

[TB&G]

 

>The Death of Common Sense

>

>

>Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who

>has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was,

>since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He

>will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:

>Knowing When to come in out Of the Rain, Why the Early Bird Gets the

>Worm, Life Isn't Always Fair, and Maybe It Was My Fault.

>

>

>Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend

>more than you earn), and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not

>children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when

>well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports

>of a six year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a

>classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch;

>and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly pupil, only worsened his

>condition.

>

>

>Common Sense's health declined further when parents attacked teachers

>for doing the job they themselves had failed to do in disciplining thei

>unruly children. His condition deteriorated even further when schools

>were required to get parental consent to administer paracetamol, sun

>lotion or a sticking plaster to a pupil - but could not inform the

>parents when a pupil became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

>

>

>Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became

>contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better

>treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when it was

>ruled that you couldn't defend yourself against a burglar in your own

>home - and if you did the burglar could sue you for assault. Common

>Sense finally lost the will to live after a woman in a restaurant

>failed to realise that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a

>little in her lap, sued the restaurant, and was promptly awarded a huge

>settlement.

>

>

>Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his

>wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He

>is survived by three stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To

>Blame and I am A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few

>realized he was gone.

>

<img src="/forum/images/graemlins/bawling.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/bawling.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/bawling.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/bawling.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/bawling.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/bawling.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/bawling.gif" alt="" />

>

[Uncle Urchin]

bollox... <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

[cantos]

Our thoughts go out to the family of common sense at this difficult time.

[Uncle Urchin]

yeah....bollox..... <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/bounce.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/bounce.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/bounce.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/bounce.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/bounce.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/bounce.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/bounce.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/bounce.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/bounce.gif" alt="" />

[Digger The Cat]

One for the rich and none for the poor,

[coupwotcoup]

Common sense was defenestrated when we had a tart referee and the home game against the Gherkins was arranged for the Saturday before Xmas....but like the Murphy's, I am not bitter.

[Bridge]

I'll drink to that!!

[Uncle Urchin]

'fenestration' is german for 'the fitting of windows'....... <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" />

 

so yes...you were defenestrated.... <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

[coupwotcoup]

der!

[Kaiser Jnr]

Common Sense can bore off! <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" />

 

However I do feel that me and common sense could be best friends one day! <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

[zody]

no chance

[Kaiser Jnr]

What the f*ck is this thread meant to mean anyway?

[coupwotcoup]

So dare I ask if we have the pleasure of your company at Rush Green on Jan 2?

[zody]

search me, if I had brains I be dangerous

[Kaiser Jnr]

Quote:

coupwotcoup? said:
So dare I ask if we have the pleasure of your company at Rush Green on Jan 2?

Whats happening then?! <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />

[coupwotcoup]

Romford v Burnham...I think, at 1pm. But then again I have been known to be wrong....

[Kaiser Jnr]

He He... <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/cheeburga.gif" alt="" />

 

I shall be there indeed, and I shall try to come make myself known. Ill get BN1 to show me the way! <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

[coupwotcoup]

Only one problem...don't think the bar is going to be open, so bring your own...plastic cups of course.

[zody]

one more problem, I wont be there

[Bridge]

....and a bucket to have a p1ss in!!!!