5000 up, an emotional speech and emotional time.

[smallsy]

5000 is a huge landmark. It is a time for reflection, banter and thinking what I could have done in the time I spent typing on here. When I first logged on I didn’t quite understand what was going on so I just started chucking banter about and abusing people. My first forum ‘mate’ was Mean It Mick Is Back, don’t worry Flanders I put mate in inverted commas so no one will think you really like me! He was often found to be bantering but luckily for me he took me under his wing. One time he did a poll for me as I didn’t know how to, it was really touching. I knew Mick Mean It Magnussen was a different person but still kept getting confused, as most do. In all truth I thought he was so biggers. It was brought up Burnham Ramblers were interested in him and like a true pro he played down the rumours and asked people to stop discussing it and let him get on with his football, who is this mug sprung to mind! Now he has signed for Burnham I can’t get my head out of his ar*e! These two fellas love the banter and have been around since the beginning! More recently the three of us went to the AFC hornchurch BBQ together with the promise of meeting all the forum gang. Thanks for coming everyone! This is emotional for me but I love these dudes.

 

In the early days it was all Enfield Town fans on these forums. There was the Romford veteran fans and some Waltham Abbey who seem to pipe up when their winning!!! (don’t bite abbey nut). Now Towner’s have moved on I can comfortably say they were all legends and certain people need a mention in such a momentous speech. Gazza, Junior, Southport, Arky, Mr Happy, Chopper and many more who aren’t coming to mind have shared much banter….especially towards the end of last season. I still say Steph is a Gaylord and his posts about how to get to Wivenhoe by boat are useless! Yes people it is a HE! Now they have moved on to pastures new but we fortunately inherited the AFC Hornchurch fans who have been pivotal in the banter. A quick summary….

 

Tree boy: slim lad, loves keeper baiting, gets emotional over his Friday poll which I developed and has a weird fascination with South Africans??

 

ESU: very aggressive gooner who is best mates with Peter Heathcote. The best way to describe ESU is [****!!****] [****!!****] [****!!****] [****!!****].

 

Westy: this fella loves a post, loves a burger (as we can see) and loves being under the thumb.

 

Uncle: The mysterious man with a love of red wine and secret identities…shhh!

 

Bridgey: Don’t mess with his niece.

 

There are other mugs I can think of but I’m getting bored and you are all gay [****!!****] anyway.

 

With thanks to Flanders, Trenks and Myself…ok just Flanders and Trenks there has been an influx of newcomers over recent months. Peter Heathcote, Silencer, Cmgeneral/Chipbrandon/Lovejoy is ledge, Michael Hunt, Super Six. Most of these I have grown to like and in some cases love…you know its you JJ! I say most because you know I don’t like you Heathy and think your banter is as funny as a heart attack etc etc …. oh no that’s you sorry! One day you will love me Heathy and I will be proud to call you my acquaintance (sorry about any spelling mistakes or grammar errors mate). The old cronies have been like father figures, not really but that’s what you associate older folk with. Hunty and Sixy! For old men you still have good banter in your lockers. Hunty I hope your firework venture goes out with a bang and I hope your knee heals up soon Sixy and you can BOSS (for you my friend Heathy) a cartwheel or two. Chip you would bite on soup but I love you and the Burnham Ressies need you back, PS can I bone your sister?

 

Silencer <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/bisou.gif" alt="" />, you deserve your own paragraph for the love you have shown me. Just like in a recent match between our teams when you said, “stick everything on the keeper he is fckin sh*t.” - i felt the love. I will try to go through this whole speech without mentioning the numbers 5 or 1 in the same phrase; for example I shall not be putting them together like this….5-1. I wouldn’t do that JJ because I respect you and understand losing a game 5-1 must have hurt! Sorry…I know I will end up with egg on my face! Anyway JJ I love our banter and the key to this was sticking together through the good times and the bad. Our banter has been simple yet effective and I feel I honoured our partnership with my dedicated signature. Its been emotional. <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/bawling.gif" alt="" />

 

I cant go without mentioning the two little queers Youth Teamer and Golden boots/Sub-no-more/SBE/Mean It something or other etc you get the drift. You two gay boys love banter. YT have fun in Newcastle because that is all you talk about and yes we know you play for Pro Performance stop telling us! GB you still have a lot to learn but you will always be remembered as a ‘One Line Wonder’. “Even Brown Love”!!!! just remembered he called himself ‘Mean It Pester’! How gay was that?

 

By the way has chip retired again? <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/busted.gif" alt="" />

 

I wont comment too much on the miserable society that is the Romford fans but I will say this. Zody please stop posting “well done reedy”! Its not big, its not clever its just plain GAY. I wont forget you this time lightweight as I know I left you out the big 1000 speech. Thanks for coming.

 

There are others I’d like to mention but have nothing to say about them because this is becoming tedious.

 

Lupercus, Coup, Craig David, Urchinette, Maxhinio (love your farts fella and thanks for the educating tour), Enfield Town fans, Other AFC hornchurch fans i forgot but pretend to like <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />, Abbey Nut, Abbey Man, EMFC (good work with the EM forum), Rifle, Manor Born, Dot Com, Chalky, Cider, Krooner (I made you what you are today). Again I got bored and cant remember any others so write your complaints at the bottom.

 

I cant not mention blowies and also my love of fine sluts. Great work from all regarding the censored “slut campaign” I started. I now have a website, www.freewebs.com/burnhamnumber1/ , where I will talk about sluts as much a I want. SLUT SLUT SLUT.

 

Now as I’m back to my tax dodging ways there is an heir to my thrown in the Kaiser Jnr. Basically he wants to be me which is understandable. Good to have a partner on board and now when you look at the Burnham Forum it is not me talking to myself with every post and thread by me! Other Burnham boys include 50/50, Jerry No.14, Boycie01. Great for the banter. Go and count your fingers Boycie. I would mention Trenks but he only goes up the bar when his REAL mates are in town.

 

I would like to finish by saying you are all legends. Including you safehands who I bet thought I’d forgotten him….I did! But when I remembered him i saved his mention till now so he felt special. Hope you appreciate this handsome and thanks for the One glove influence. And the One glove reminds me of Smoothy who was a c*ck at first giving me so much banter I couldn’t take the heat but once i met the fella he is top bloke, good keeper and hates a ping - gives me a rod on just thinking about it. and to be fair his banter was along the lines of I am a sh*t Gk and we all know this is not far from the truth, right harold?

 

I owe it to MIMIB to make you all lick my newly shaved balls. Its been emotional. Forum Legends forever. Trenks you slim lad with one breast. Yes I’m a midget yes I’m bald. I love the banter, you love the banter, we all love it.

[retard]

Bore off you little rat

[coupwotcoup]

and your point is?

[Uncle Urchin]

you may be small in stature Rob but you have a big heart...a big personality and a big sense of humour which are three factors needed along lifes chequered highway... <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

 

pity about your goalkeeping ability but hey man....

 

you can't have everything.... <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

[smallsy]

cheers unc.

 

nutcase thanks for coming mate. you are obviously having a mid life crisis and felt left out you didnt get a mention on the speech. better luck next time eh!

[Chopper]

Rob you are a legend mate!!!!!

[zody]

keepers union sticking together, hi ya Andy

[Gazza]

Hey Junior I got mentioned before you haha!

 

Am well emotional BN1, I will make a big effort to put you back at the top of the Town's legends list in front of Safehands.

[retard]

I just think no one cares that you are on to your 5000 post. You need to get a life and go out more

[Kaiser Jnr]

BN1 is respected by many of this forum as a "forum legend".

So, how about you bore off nutcase and suck my balls. <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/bootyshake.gif" alt="" />

[NotTheRealSteveWest]

Hmm, I understand that the poll was rigged!!!!

[Gazza]

Quote:

nutcase said:
I just think no one cares that you are on to your 5000 post. You need to get a life and go out more

Woah!!! Us Towners care, we love the legend that is BN1.

[and1inthetree]

i'm with you on this one nutcase, bn1 should get a life and stop sucking scrotum.

[Kaiser Jnr]

There is love between treeboy and bn1 <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/bisou.gif" alt="" />

[and1inthetree]

he has a sexy behind, and no mistake about it, but he just wants me to teabag him...

[Mr Happy]

BN1. What can I say? I wish I was you!

[cider]

You are a leg end BN1 just remember water off a ducks back when you here the short keeper jibes.Just let it all go over your head.

[Lightweight]

I'm filling up

[Bridge]

......and between your little legs!!

[maxinio]

Blimey Rob, took me 5 hrs to read it so must have taken you days to type it.

I'm watching mate, maybe the GB final at your gaff eh?