Just seen this.....

[theofficeboy]

...on the Isthmian Fans Forum. Made me chuckle - There's nothing like a few April fools!

 

BREAKING NEWS - by 'Reuters'

 

At 9am tomorrow George Borg will be announced as the new Dr Who on a three year rolling contract of 300 grand a year. His new side kick will be 'Gabby Abbot' and the tardis will be renamed 'The Wind Up'. Sources at the BBC inform us that his 25 year 100 grand a week cash contract is being reluctantly torn up by the Braintree Chairman in exchange for a 50 year contract for the printing of all BBC publicity photographs. Mr Harding was said to be inconsolable at the thought of losing George but stated at a press conference held earlier today at the High Court in the Strand. "I really do wish George all the best in his new roll as Dr Who, he's suited for the roll and has waited all his life to achieve the recognition that he deserves, somehow Braintree will survive with our new manager Garry Hill in charge."

 

Later this afternoon reports were coming in from BBC Weymouth that Garry Hill had resigned from the towns football club on ill health grounds and that he was to take a much needed holiday. Mr Hill said''I have taken this club as far as I can in the two weeks that I have been here and I need a break and a new challenge"

 

In todays other main story, it is reported that men in white coats becalmed and arrested a well known NL football manager who had gone berserk outside of the FA headquarters in Soho. Lets hope George makes it in time for the first rehearsal )

 

More news on the hour.

[Ian_W]

The spelling mistake gives it away - if had said Garry Hall I would have believed it

[Iron Webbo]

Well I believed it!

[Uncle Urchin]

and people say that I post outrageous things..... <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" />

 

as if anyone would close our football club down....everyone loves us to much.... <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

 

money doesn't count in the NL game surely.... <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

[Iron Webbo]

outrageous? occasionally.

 

closing down? you have a cunning plan, surely!

 

money? made a few bob this week.

[Uncle Urchin]

well give george a rise then and stop the BBC from pinching him as the 'time lord'..... <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

[Iron Webbo]

George? Naah - he's still getting over not getting the Muff job.

 

Nice house down there apparently?

[Uncle Urchin]

weymouth is a great town.....I envy 'em all....

 

had a french tart down there in the seventies when I was holed up in bournemouth...used to nip over and give her one on a saturday night...

 

strangest thing though...she was into the occult....pentangles and all sorts of black magic stuff on the floor....

 

wonder if its the same gaff.... <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

[Iron Webbo]

The dark side can be useful. When I want to get rid of the Jehovah brigade, I tell 'em I'm a Satanist, they don't try to sell me the Watch Tower then!

 

As to the house, I just have this mental picture of Gary making 'em all breakfast.

[Uncle Urchin]

well perhaps 'we'd' be best watching out for 'em next year (if you make it now borgies exploded) <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

 

love 'em or hate 'em...calder and hills are a formidable team at getting results and I can tell you that from first hand experience....if martyn has the dosh...they will deliver........

 

so.....my dosh is on muff next year.....we of course will be rank outsiders...(if we survive georgies attempts to close us down that is and I am not optimistic....honourable men do tend to win in these matters) <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

[DADDY HOMER 030crew]

THEN AGAIN MR BORG COULD GO THE SAME WAY AS SOME OF THE Dr WHO props,someone thought it would be a good idea to have a clear up and put a full size tardis on the fire.

[Iron Webbo]

This year? not sure. Still a lot of work to be done. Tricky tomorrow. George's OK, we did alright against the Ding, but got mugged in the suburbs of Maldon.

 

You'll be alright. Let's hope we all get what we want from the next few weeks.

 

Five very's - that won't last. Rose tinted, naah. Got my peekers wide open. Fans? we're all that surely?

[Uncle Urchin]

have to say mate that if you had your 'peckers wide open' you would not have allowed the situation to get so out of hand with Borg...(and save me the speech about he's his own man...he'll never get another job in NL again after this lot so your the only game in town for him)....

 

anyway....good luck against the 'white cliffs' manana (and you know I don't mean it <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />)

 

and yes indeed....you got it right....

 

wednesday will come and go without georgie getting any joy.... <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

 

bless him....if only he had been sensible....but that again would have been far to much to expect.... <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

[Iron Webbo]

time will tell Unc. I'll just be glad when it's all behind us so we can move on and concentrate on the things that matter.

 

Anyway, off to play with the motorway. Tell Jen another work of art is done.

 

Looking forward to a bottle of Chianti, having done far too many hours this week! Have a good weekend.

[Diz]

Another one taken from the Isthmian forum..

 

George Borg has this morning issued a statement containing a number of apologies related to incidents in the last twelve months.

 

These included an apology to Heybridge Swifts FC after an incident an Christmas, an apology to Staines Town after comments made about them, an apology to Wealdstone FC for a recent press article, an apology to Lee Harding for continually putting his not inconsiderable frame in the limelight, an apology to Hornchurch FC for trying to close them down, an apology to the Tourettes Syndrome Society for giving them a bad name, an apology to the FA for wearing down the carpet in the Disciplinary Hearing Committee Room and an apology to his wife for short changing her since a recent operation.

 

George is the Chair-person of a small masonic Chapter known as "Uno-Testes", which apparently has no connection with his footballing career - a game traditionally played with one ball - and differs from the majority of the human race who find themselves more naturally as "Duo-Testes"