Ann Summers National Orgasm Week!!!!!!!!!

[Claire!]

Fantastic!!!!!!!!!!

 

Well i guess i'll have to pop down to Ann Summers and get me a rabbit!!!!!!! (0 to orgasm in 60 seconds!!!!!!!!! OMG!!!!!!!!! Who needs a bloke when i can have a rabbit?!!!!!!!!!!)

 

And only 20% of people have had the best sex ever in the last 12 months. <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

 

 

[YB941 5thD EFM ~soul~]

I find 20% an extraordinarily high figure, to be honest.

 

Thought you women preferred a bit longer than 60 seconds to reach orgasm? Still, you have to take what you can get, I guess!!

 

 

[Claire!]

LOL!!!!!!!!!!! Exactly!!!!! You have to take what you can get!!!!!!!!!

[AFF]

Here's another for you, Claire:

 

Who said: "Sex is just 3 minutes of squelch"? [He, and it is a 'he', hadn't heard about your rabbit, clearly].

[Claire!]

I've just realised that i have a £5 gift voucher (i got it free because i spent over £40 in there one afternoon!!!!) to spend in Ann Summers!!!!!

 

Was going to use it towards a maids or nurses outfit, but guess i wont be needing that anymore. Maybe i'll go out and treat myself to a rabbit?!!!!!!!!!

[Claire!]

Who did say that AFF?!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Blimey - 3 minutes?!!!!!! LOL!!!!!!

[AFF]

You appear to be impressed by the speed of the 'rabbit', Claire. I tend to share Zealster's view and I imagine that he would consider the 3 minutes from the quote in the same way. Perhaps you have been mixing with the wrong company lately Claire? [Only in the sense of 'talking the talk' rather than 'walking the walk', of course]

 

That quote was from Sid Vicious.

 

Here's one more, much easier this time:

 

Who said "I have to tell you about the birds and the bees. The birds have sex with the bees"?

[Claire!]

LOL!!!!!!!!

 

Well if you don't have much time, the rabbit would do the trick!!!!!!!

 

But a rabbit can't give the one thing a girl craves for!

 

Yeah, i don't understand the birds and the bees thing. Apart from the birds are obviously the girls and the bees, are well, the boys, as boys usually leave a nasty sting to upset and hurt the birds.

 

Maybe that is what the moral of explaining the birds and the bees?

 

Or, it's just that opposites attract?

 

Why couldn't it be, the the squirrels and the rabbits? or the horses and the cows (ohhh that would be wrong, they are both female!!!!!!!)

 

LOL!!!!!!! Oh, Ann Summers is great!!!!!!!!

[YB941 5thD EFM ~soul~]

What's the male version of a horse, then??

 

<img src="/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />

 

 

[Claire!]

a mare!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[YB941 5thD EFM ~soul~]

I see.

 

 

[Claire!]

Is it not a mare then? I though a female horse was called a mare, and a male cow is a bollock

[YB941 5thD EFM ~soul~]

You just said that a male horse was a mare, and now you're saying female is a mare.

 

You're confusing me, Claire.

 

And I'm pretty sure that male cows aren't spelt quite like that!!

 

 

[Claire!]

Ohh, i'm confused now!!!!!!!!

 

I know a female horse is a horse, and a male horse is called a mare.

 

A Female cow is called a cow and a male cow is called a bollock.

 

So if i said that we could re-use the phrase birs and the bees, with the horses and the cows, then that would be incorrect as they are both female?

 

Or sheep could be involved!!!!!!!!!!!

[YB941 5thD EFM ~soul~]

Any idea what a filly is, Claire??

 

I think you'll find that the word 'horse' refers to both male and female of the species.

 

 

[Claire!]

LOL!!!!!!!!

 

Never heard of a filly zeal!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[YB941 5thD EFM ~soul~]

I can't believe I'm even having this conversation, but...

 

You said: "or the horses and the cows (ohhh that would be wrong, they are both female!!!!!!!)"

 

Horses are both male and female, Claire.

 

As you pointed out by stating that "a male horse is called a mare".

 

What's a stallion??

 

 

[Claire!]

I thought they were called mares? A stallion is a big horse?

 

Oh i don't know!!!!!!!!!

 

I do no however that Danny was named after a horse!!!!!!!!!!!

[YB941 5thD EFM ~soul~]

And what's a male cow called, did you say??

 

 

[Claire!]

a bollock or a bull for short