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So you think you've done some stupid stuff...


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while drunk?

 

Taken from the Mirror, by Matt Roper:

 

1. Scott Donlan 19, broke into Newquay Zoo in Cornwall and tried to feed 2 lions an ice-cream after drinking 12 pints in August 2002

 

2. Londoner David Nicholas gave a waitress a $10,000 tip at a Chicago nightclub in June 2000- and later told his wife Mairi he couldn't remember a thing.

 

3. Scottish student Dean Allen, 22, superglued a friend's eye shut as a party prank in 1999. After medics removed the eyelid, Dean confessed: "I was drunk and it was a joke- not a very funny one"

 

4.Scot Kevin McGill told friends he had one 1 million pounds on the lottery and even had a celebratory barbecue for friends- when really he had only won a tenner. When his wife threatened to leave him, he said: "It was simply a drunken prank that went wrong. I regret it now."

 

5.Five builders spent the night in police cells in May 2003 after running around the grounds of Prince Charles' Highgrove home then playing rugby with a plastic owl.

 

6.Twelve drunken students at a 21st birthday party in April last year broke into St. Andrews aquarium in Scotland, stripped off and dived into the shark tank- copying a scene from Neighbours.

 

7.A New York teenager recieved a one year jail sentence last January after setting his familiy's parakeet on fire during a party the posting pictures of the roasted bird on the internet.

 

8.Comedian Dave Gorman was so frustrated by bouncers asking for ID while on a pub crawl in America he had his driving licence tattooed on his arm.

 

9.Olicer Reed once challenged Lee Marvin to a vodka drinking contest, stripped off in a restaurant and jumped into a tank of goldfish.

 

10 Daniel Langley decided to take a shortcut home last month- across the Bristol Channel. He was rescued by a helicopter after ending up waist-deep in quicksand as the tide came in.

 

11. Robert Mitchell was fined 500pounds in September after drunkenly heading towards the Royal box- where Tony Blair was sitting with the Queen-at the Braemar Gathering in Aberdeenshire to tell the Prime Minister he was a " f@cking @rsehole".

 

Quality!

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some of them aint sooopid

 

no. 11.seems fair enough

9.olly reed, kind of bloke everyone would have wanted to meet, bit of a [***!!***] but ...

 

as for the stoo-dent "pranks"

the pillow biting faggots should have been shot afterwards

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student has 2 pints of cider.. falls over in his/her own sick..

makes up ludicrous jape about heroic drinking..

spends next three days in bed crying and feeling icky

moans about not getting any free cash

does exam a retarded gerbil could pass

moans about homework.

 

i think that covers the student stuff

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telling a french copper with a shooter at charles de gaulle airport thet there was no way i was too drunk to get the last flight home and that if he wanted some i would be more than happy to oblige in full anglo saxon.. bit hazy on the facts but im sure my mate said (as we settled down to a nights kip in the multi story car park there) that is i hadnt mentioned the war and insisted on trying to grab the shooter we may have got on the flight

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