Embarrasing things........ !!!!!

[Big J R]

[color:"blue"] Well, Crimble is all but over and Maladroit suggested the following on another thread in The Pub, so, over to you lot.............

[color:"red"]

'Ere Big JR...that's an idea for a Thread.

"Embarrasing things you've seen or done at staff parties".

 

 

[color:"blue"] I reckon in my 56 years plus, I've see quite a bit and done quite a bit. Never mind what I've done,

 

HOWEVER, I did get a phone call at home at about 9p.m. one Christmas Eve from a distraught mother wondering where her beloved 17 year-old warehouseman son was. I was duty key-holder, and as I'd already started the festive celebrations, alcoholically speaking, had to get transport back to work, only to find the said teenager, fast asleep on a bale of wood-wool in the packing department.

 

Then there was the time in the post-room. [color:"green"] (Er ! Perhaps not !)

 

<img src="/images/graemlins/chloe.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />

[mala_D]

At a staff meal in a rather nice Chinese restaurant, our 18yr old receptionist got langered on Sambouka (?) and proceded to get up on the table, in front of 40 other respectable diners I might add, and sing Joeline at the top of her voice. All while flashing her knickers at everyone too.

If that wasn't bad enough, she stood on the large "lazy susan" [rotating marble disc for putting dishes on, for those who don't know] and being pi55ed lost her balance and fell flat on her rear. She very nearly had a champagne glass wedged in somewhere rather neaughty if it wern't for the quick reactions of my mate who grabbed it out of the way before her ar5e met the table.

 

[mala_D]

Xmas Eve, in a pub in Essex.

The ladies toilet of which had a throw-bolt on the bar-side of the door. [To stop burglars getting into the pub from the toilets presumably].

Two of our lasses went to the loo and my mate decided it would be a rather good prank to bolt the door, and lock them in.

After about 10 mins of banging and shouting, he unlocked it only to find the pub manageress, red in the face, with our two lasses standing behind her. Needless to say, she didn't find the funny side and barred my mate.

 

[Little Miss Urchin]

I thought you were an ex/current/injured copper-type person, Big J.R. <img src="/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />

[Big J R]

Quote:

Little Miss Urchin said:
I thought you were an ex/current/injured copper-type person, Big J.R. <img src="/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />

[color:"blue"] OK Miss, I admit it ! But in the good old days, when coppers WERE coppers, we knew how to enjoy ourselves.

There was the time, not belong 'Er Indoors and I tied the knot, though !

New Years Eve - 1970, I think ! I was with Surrey, but some mates across the border in The Met decided we'd all go to the Greyhound on the Scilly Isles, (A.3 south to Guildford from London, near Esher), for the New Years festivities.

I somehow managed to break a pint glass, quite accidently. Landlord was NOT amused ! A few minutes later, one of the gang asked me how I'd managed to break the glass in the first place. Like a prat, I said, 'I just went to pick it up from the table, like this !!'

You've guessed it ! Another broken glass and this was the first time in my life I was ever barred from a public house.

Needless to say, we all ended up in a far more considerate pub in Sheen, (near Richmond !) Well - It was a Met Cops haunt at that time !

[American FLEET FAN No1]

WOW JR.you never told me you were an ex-cop.I nearly told you about the time i woke up after a night out with the boys to find i had some new lawn furniture, 1 table complete with Youngs Bitter umbrella..........glad i kept that one to myself....... <img src="/images/graemlins/roflmao.gif" alt="" />

[lucky7s]

I was on holiday down under (aus) to see my dad, who lived there at the time, he was a builder and the crew that worked with him , well you know what builders are like for boozing ... these were aussie builders and they took me into sydney to see the nightlife, WOW talk about a city that never sleeps, and these guys could drink aswell ... anyway we took a train into the city centre and started to do the clubs ... ending up in kings cross ... that wasn't my idea either, great show though and lots more to drink, about 6.00am we decided to make tracks back home, so we got to the train stn, but found the gates locked, they were about 6 ft tall, so someone suggested we climb the gates in order to get in, to get a train home, we somehow managed to scale the gates got upto the platform to find the next train was at 8.00am, wondered why the gates were locked, then next thing some security guard shouted, so we legged it back to the locked gates, back up over we went and decided it might be easier if we got a cab home ... the things you do after a few drinks eh ... lol, it's funny now thinking back.

[Big J R]

Quote:

lucky7s said:
I was on holiday down under (aus) to see my dad, who lived there at the time, he was a builder and the crew that worked with him , well you know what builders are like for boozing ... these were aussie builders and they took me into sydney to see the nightlife, WOW talk about a city that never sleeps, and these guys could drink aswell ... anyway we took a train into the city centre and started to do the clubs ... ending up in kings cross ... that wasn't my idea either, great show though and lots more to drink, about 6.00am we decided to make tracks back home, so we got to the train stn, but found the gates locked, they were about 6 ft tall, so someone suggested we climb the gates in order to get in, to get a train home, we somehow managed to scale the gates got upto the platform to find the next train was at 8.00am, wondered why the gates were locked, then next thing some security guard shouted, so we legged it back to the locked gates, back up over we went and decided it might be easier if we got a cab home ... the things you do after a few drinks eh ... lol, it's funny now thinking back.

[color:"blue"] And I was told that Sydney was a 'pooofs paradise' !

Oh well - It takes all-sorts.

[Rushy]

aahh..

 

about 1997, left the office after many drinks and we all trooped off to Halfway House on the A127. This is where copious amounts of free drink was consumed by all, including myself and a sales girl in my office. Closing time came around..and everyone got a cab apart from us 2. Whilst sheltering from the cold waiting for a cab in a phone box outside the pub we got a little..erm.. "warmer".. She was a pretty girl but lets say built for comfort not for speed.. and several minutes later the phone directory made a good headrest. As I was somewhat busy I hadnt noticed the director pulling alongside to offer a lift..

 

to this day I still get pi55 taken..

[lucky7s]

Quote:

Big J R said:
[color:"blue"] And I was told that Sydney was a 'pooofs paradise' !

Oh well - It takes all-sorts.

I wasn't there long enough to notice that, it was a superb holiday and a great place to visit.

Don't you just love the aussie accent and the laid back nature of the people in general, great sense of humour too.