Just for laughs- The Great Escape !

[3spirit]

If we are to get promoted this season it will be reminiscent of The Great Escape film.So here's a well meaning send up for all Slough Town fans/players and management,in the spirit of our long dead but not forgotten Conference fanzine 'Rebel Without A Clue'.

 

The Great Escape featuring the assorted cast of Slough Town F.C...............

Starring

Steve 'The Big X' Bateman[Richard Attenborough]- the Squadron Leader who organises the escapes/games/plots but gets caught at the end!

 

Fred 'The Security Sergeant' Cummings[German/Harry Riebauer]- hold back the POW's/players from escaping/playing!

 

James 'Security' Warrington[William Russell] - his hands keeps us safe.

 

Steve 'The Cooler King' Sinclair[steve McQueen] -The star but looks like he's just got off a motorbike with out wearing a helmet!

 

Steve 'The Kommandant' Perkins[German Hans Messerner]- respected by the POW's/players/supporters but being relieved, sooner rather than later of his duties!

 

Dave' The Adjutant' Woozley'[German Robert Freitag]- takes over from the Kommandant at the end of the season!

 

Ben 'The Ferret' Abbey[German Robert Graf] -sniffs out a goal when we are desperate!

 

Alex 'The Surveyor[also known as The Ostrich] Brown- sees over everything!

 

......more to follow .........

[3spirit]

...Danny 'Dispersal' Murphy[David McCallum]- gets his crosses in,no problem.Where they go is!

 

Ollie 'The Forger' Burgess[Donald Pleasance]-forges ahead but run's up blind alley's!

 

Nathan Bowden-Haase'The Scrounger'[James Garner]- you get everything you want from this defender/POW!

 

Adam 'The Tailor' Logie[Robert Desmond]- a good fit for any other team/escape party but not always in 'Big X's plan!

[3spirit]

Stuart 'Diversions' Swift[Tom Adams]- called into action when 'Big X's' game plan are failing!

 

Sean 'Intelligence' Sonner[Gordon Jackson]-what he goes on about to himself when on the pitch is a mystery but he seems to make sense!

 

Danny 'The Tunnel King' Burnell[Charles Bronson]-shoots like he's in a tunnel but somehow the ball finds the net!

 

[3spirit]

Simon 'The Mole] Sweeney[[Angus Lennie]-as tight as a Scotsman by not giving the ball away and the opposition never see him coming when he makes a tackle!

 

Paul 'The Manufacturer' Coyne[James Coburn]-makes the passes and keeps the team/escape party functioning.Escapes in a boat,sometimes we think his shooting is on par with another sea hero,the one legged Long John Silver!

 

Jamie 'the SBO' Jackson[James Donald]- respected older statesman but get's left in the changing room/prison camp when the POW's/players are escaping/playing!

 

'The other Tunnel King'[John Leyton]- the player that banged on the St Neots/Dennis Greene's dressing room door! ha ha!

 

Mike 'the Getapo' Kearns/St Neots Chairman[German Ulrich Beiger]-orders the executions of the POW'S/Slough Town fc players! and none of the Slough faithful in the audience like him! lol!

 

more to follow.....

more to follow........

[3spirit]

For the remake.....

Chris 'The Enigma' Herron[ Brad Pitt]-mystifying on the pitch and illusive in the 'camp'!

 

Shaun 'The fitness coach/trainer' Byrne[barry[sean? out of Eastenders/Extras]- Starts the film but only makes the first half hour.The rest of his role is on the cutting room floor!

 

Sam 'Billy The Kid' Bateman [what's is name McCaulkin/Home Alone star]-missing in action,last seen in Flackwell Heath colours.Definite potential but Big X not sure he's ready yet!

 

George 'The Cleaner' Coyle [Orlando Bloom]- Missing in action.Could be the next big thing in the middle but people forget who he is or where he is!

 

Steve [The Godfather' Easterbrook[Marlon Brando]-the 'daddy' of all actors/Chairmen!

 

Roy 'The DJ' Merryweather[Robin Williams in his role in Good Morning Vietnam]-Our 2nd in command and with the velvet voice,on the worst tannoy of any football ground.His microphone talking is on par with Les Dawson's piano playing! he he ho ho!

 

and finally.....Chris 'The Enforcer' Sliski[Clint Eastwood].Everybody likes him and a good guy to have around.Just don't say anything out of turn on the forum !!!!!

 

[3spirit]

Cameo roles......

Jerome' The Magician' Anderson [Will Smith] - never sure what he's going to do and nor is he ! Hoping he will be the rabbit out of the hat for the remainder of this season and next season, but not a rabbit caught in the headlights!

 

Lloyd 'The Old Dog' Owusu [Morgan Freeman]-can't teach him any new tricks.Last seen heading off in the sunset like in the end of Shawshank Redemption.

[3spirit]

Alex Brown was the actor Nigel Stock, by the way.The author 3spirit lost the plot!