A tricky question

[Chubbhead EFM]

Right, I was walking along with my brother and our friend, both 21 years old. We walked past two school girls who I would have said were about 14/15. Our friend said one of the girls was 'nice' and I said (as a joke) that he shouldn't say that as she was a school girl and therefore obviously underage. Therein started a huge debate that lasted the whole day.

 

He said (and my brother agreed) that it was okay to admire the girls so long as you didn't do anything. But then I was arguing, where do you stop with that theory? Going by that logic you could 'look at' a VERY young child and ague that because you're not acting on it, you're not doing anything wrong. But really, you are! Aren't you? I know that's a completeley different kettel of fish to the situation above, but isn't the principal the same? And although we have the age of consent for the actual act of sex, is there an unwritten law in society that prescirbes a different age for when it is acceptable to 'admire' someone so long as you don't act on it? and what is that age?

 

Discuss!

[CANV EFM]

tell him to stick to women in their thirties.. they are about 40 times better at 'it' and dont give a toss if you dont call em.. plus they will probably be about 50 times richer than the average 21 year old which helps when it comes to getting p.ssed

[pabird]

Whilst in agreement with Canv!s jokey way of response your question does raise a more serious issue, boys generally enjoy a longer childhood than girls (30/40 years in some cases) and peer pressure and media pressure robs them of the extended childhood enjoyed by the boys

Nothing more naff or sad than some 11 or 12 year old girl staggering around in high heels painted up like Sitting Bull

Lets encourage the girls to romp around like teenage boys who generally do!nt have a care in the world, society should avoid at all costs placing young girls in the sex war firing line

[Colin Zeal EFM]

As a serious answer to your question, Chubbster, your mate admiring a 15-year-old bird is nothing that we haven't all done. I'd only get seriously concerned about him if he started admiring pre-pubescents.

 

As for the ruling on under-age sex, I think the law views sleeping with a 15-year-old very differently to sleeping with a pre-pubescent. I'm not sure you're considered a paedophile if you have sex with a 14- or 15-year-old.

 

 

[Chubbhead EFM]

oh god, I know he's not a paedo! He's got two young nephews!

 

I see your point about there being a difference between pre-pubescents and 14/15 year olds. I think it's okay to look at a girl (or boy) of that age so long as you use the appropriate language. For ecxample, you wouldn't say they were gorgoeus, or they had nice tits, 'cos that would be wrong. But what he said, that she was nice looking, was okay- in my opinion.

 

Zeal, I think that if you have sex with a 14/15 year old, you basically get done for rape don't you(depending on whether it was a boy or a girl)?Although of course every case is different.

[Colin Zeal EFM]

Sorry Chubbster - wasn't insinuating anything about your mate. Was just trying to highlight a difference.

 

Yeah, it's called statutory rape, or something like that. Simple fact is, a hell of a lot of 14/15 year old girls are at it, and at it with older guys, and I bet a lot of the time, the bloke isn't even aware of her age. But that's digressing somewhat.

 

Is it wrong to say that a 15-year old girl is "gorgeous" or has "nice tits"? Probably, I don't know really. If someone looked at (for example) Charlotte Church (when she was 15) and said she had "great tits", is that wrong? I know a hell of a lot of blokes (myself included) who have said it.

 

It is wrong to have sex with girls of 15. I'm not sure it's wrong for your mate to find them attractive.

 

 

[Chubbhead EFM]

It's okay Zeal, I was only joking!

 

Actually, let's just look at this argument from a different angle here. If it was an older man, let's just say 21, having sex with/fancying a 15 year old boy what would you say then(after all, the homosexual age of consent is now 16)? Or an older woman having sex with an underage boy? Perhaps pabird is right after all. I didn't want to turn this into a gender debate, but perhaps it's an unavoidable factor when talking about laws against sex crimes.

 

I know a lot of the time people will answer that latter one by saying that it's most boys fantasy to sleep with an older woman, but I reckon the reality is different. An investigation I read about a few years ago, showed that men who had sexual experiences with older women at a young age showed signs of distress shared by other sexual abuse victims. Also, by saying that sort of thing, I think stops justice being done properly. I think women who sleep with underage boys (or girls for that matter) should be punished equally as harsh as male offenders. They are, after all, sleeping with a child, in the eyes of the law.

 

As for saying a 15 year old girl has 'nice tits', I'm just using that expression as an example. What I'm getting at is you wouldn't use overtly or aggresively sexual terms when talking about a young girl/boy. I mean I wouldn't look at a 15 year old boy and say 'he's got a nice [****!!****], I'd like to **** him'. What I'm saying is, is I think there should be a difference in the sort of language used to admire a young boy/girl to that used to admire someone older. I don't think I'm explaining myself very well here!

[Chubbhead EFM]

By the way, I'm only saying this as a topic for conversation, not having a go or anything!

[CANV EFM]

fk all this crap.. make all under 16's wear dungarees then everyone knows where they are.. as for young geezers having 'distress' from getting bunked by an older woman.. hahahha i wont get distressed about that till im 49

[CANV EFM]

and then ill just up it till 59.. etc etc

[Colin Zeal EFM]

I hear everything you're saying Chubbhead, but we seem to be talking at cross purposes. Your last post was almost entirely about 'having sex' with someone of 15, which isn't what I was talking about.

 

I was saying that I think it's okay to find a 15-year-old girl (or boy) attractive as long as you don't act on it. If you do, then you're breaking the law.

 

If you find someone who has matured and fully developed attractive, and that is the full extent of the situation, then it is surely not immoral?

 

I don't know really. The fact that only you and I are really discussing this at length tells me the subject is something of a 'hot potato' (to nick one of Alan Partridge's phrases!)

 

 

[EFM The Firm, The Voice]

If you're not meant ot find the Under 16's attractive then S Club 8 would be illegal!

[Chubbhead EFM]

Quote:

CANV said:
fk all this crap.. make all under 16's wear dungarees then everyone knows where they are.. as for young geezers having 'distress' from getting bunked by an older woman.. hahahha i wont get distressed about that till im 49

Thought you'd say something like that! <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Zeal, I knew you'd be up for 'a heated debate', as Mrs Merton would say! (am I the only one who thought that show was crap?)