Football Jokes

[CW1975]

When asked who his favorite Qatar player was, Sepp Blatter replied......... 'Eric Clapton'

[manager50]

I've been told today that there will no longer be a Premiership Special laid on by British rail to Upton Park - due to a points failure!!!!!!!!

[Ollers]

What's the difference between Spurs and a tea bag?

A tea bag stays in the cup longer.

[The Fan]

LOVE THE THREAD

we are in BIG JR area now, hope the big man finds time, to lighten the mood.

[Jurg78]

The best football joke I've heard in a while............

 

NICE GUY.............LOL!!!!

[Smudge]

My wife should be a Goalie,I havent scored for Months.

 

 

[The Fan]

The best football joke I've heard in a while............

 

NICE GUY.............LOL!!!!

bit rude jurg.

if you want a laugh jurg puts a kit on most weeks. he is the 1 with the 70s porn star looks.

[NICE GUY]

The best football joke I've heard in a while............

 

NICE GUY.............LOL!!!!

 

HERE'S A GOODUN' JURG, A GOALKEPER IN 'CCL '' DIV. 1 '' GOTTA BE THE BEST IN THE CCL LEAGUES.......TOUCHE.....LOL !!!

[NICE GUY]

The best football joke I've heard in a while............

 

NICE GUY.............LOL!!!!

bit rude jurg.

if you want a laugh jurg puts a kit on most weeks. he is the 1 with the 70s porn star looks.

 

 

AHHH TF I LIKE YOU......................HONEST !

[spy]

A blonde gets a job as a P.E. teacher of 16 year olds. She notices a boy in the field standing all alone, while all the other kids are running around having fun. She takes pity on him and decides to speak to him. "You ok?" she says. "Yes" he says. "You can go and play with the other kids you know" she says. "It's best I stay here" he says. "Why" asks the blonde.He says, "Because I'm the fooking goalkeeper" !!!!!

[Terrence Collina]

what do you get if you cross a midlands football team with an ice cream?

 

what do you get if you cross an ex scottish footballer and a sweet?

[CW1975]

The seven dwarfs are down in the mines when there is a cave-in.

 

Snow White runs to the entrance and yells down to them.

 

In the distance a voice shouts out "Arsenal are good enough to win the Premiership."

 

Snow White says..................... "Well at least Dopey's alive!"

[Weeble]

2 flies in a saucer one says to the other....I think were in the cup next week.....

[Jurg78]

The best football joke I've heard in a while............

 

NICE GUY.............LOL!!!!

bit rude jurg.

if you want a laugh jurg puts a kit on most weeks. he is the 1 with the 70s porn star looks.

 

That is indeed me.....what can I say, I like to have my own style!

[Jurg78]

The best football joke I've heard in a while............

 

NICE GUY.............LOL!!!!

 

HERE'S A GOODUN' JURG, A GOALKEPER IN 'CCL '' DIV. 1 '' GOTTA BE THE BEST IN THE CCL LEAGUES.......TOUCHE.....LOL !!!

 

Well that's certainly not me mate, so that joke fails somewhat!

[NICE GUY]

The best football joke I've heard in a while............

 

NICE GUY.............LOL!!!!

 

HERE'S A GOODUN' JURG, A GOALKEPER IN 'CCL '' DIV. 1 '' GOTTA BE THE BEST IN THE CCL LEAGUES.......TOUCHE.....LOL !!!

 

Well that's certainly not me mate, so that joke fails somewhat!

 

IT'S OKAY JURG I KNOW YOU'RE NOT............. THAT WAS THE JOKE !

[Game of two halves]

Mike Ashley?

[CW1975]

Two blokes were walking through a cemetery when they came across a tombstone that read:

 

"Here lies John Sweeney, a good man and a Chelsea fan."

 

So, one of them asked the other: "When the hell did they start putting two people in one grave?"

[Spencer]

So Jermaine Defoe walks into a club, sees a sexy blonde bird, walks up behind her and says "Quick, get ya coat luv, youve pulled!" She turns around and says "Ooh your a little forward!"

[Game of two halves]

So Jermaine Defoe walks into a club, sees a sexy blonde bird, walks up behind her and says "Quick, get ya coat luv, youve pulled!" She turns around and says "Ooh your a little forward!"

As the bell boy in the lift would say " that is wrong on so many levels"