Harefield United....

[yam yam]

Originally Posted By: Wader

my unlucky little hares foot.

I must take you to task on that comment.

Nothing unlucky about throwing away a 15pt lead...gross incompetence comes to mind,,,,,













































so does lack of bottle!!



btw Hare............what colour box did they put the losers medal in?

[the hare]

much did you win the league by? 1 yes 1 goal not a runaway success was it .

 

so forget the no bottle crap!!!

[samuelsmiles]

As well as Brian Connolly from the mighty Sweet being brought up in Harefield, Eddie Richards, a club official, played drums for the mighty Edison Lighthouse.

 

 

 

ps. If anyone sees the filthy swine Giant Reed, tell him he can keep my Daphne but i'm sending my butler down to retrieve the Bentley.

[Giant Reed]

Samuel, I normally hold so called "modern music" in utter contempt. But I must say I do like the cut of Eddison Lighthouse's jib. They are obviously a young and vibrant group of musicians teetering on the precipice of greatness.

 

However,far be it from me to defecate on your best laid plans but your Bentley has,like your Daphne,blown a gasket.

Smoke poured from the back,followed by an odourous,viscid fluid, and then...BANG!!!

The motor's fvcked an' all!

 

You are more than welcome to send your butler over to collect them both. But I most humbly suggest that he brings a mop,a bucket,and a very strong constitution!

[buck rogers]

samuel did you notice it was willow and bellis on backing vocals. both before they lost all their hair.

 

but the dress sence hasnt changed!

[samuelsmiles]

Reed, you should be ashamed of yourself you filthy swine.

 

As his loyal butler of many years standing, I have to inform you that Sir has had a relapse, and is currently lacking the fortitude to respond to you're shameful ribaldry.

 

Indeed, he has been pacing the grounds all afternoon muttering the name of his Daphne whom I believe you have exploded. Most regretable.

 

Reed, you are, most certainly, a jingle brained bumfiddle. However, you must keep Poncey and Norman Hunter secure at all times, for Sir is alarmingly unpredictable presently.

 

Have you fixed the Bentley?

 

 

 

Always look on the bright side of life.

[buck rogers]

just a reminder of harefields first pre-season game

 

saturday 11th july

hitchin Town v Harefield utd

venue: Baldock Town fc

kick off 11.00

 

[Football Man]

11:30 according to Hitchin!

[buck rogers]

just making sure our lot get up in the morning. its a long drive !!

[buck rogers]

Harefields Middlesex cup draws :

 

senior challenge : away to hillingdon bro or enfield town

2nd round 7th dec (ish)

 

Premier cup (res): away to bedfont green res

2nd round 16th nov (ish)

[the hare]

harefield 1-1 hitching . not many first teamers on duty. so not much to be learnt. Rumours going around about whos missing but nothing concrete yet. except for 1 !!!! news later when its confirmed.

[Rhodes]

I see there is a brief report of the proceedings on Hitchin Town's Website:

 

http://www.hitchintownfc.co.uk/reports/2009_10/.shtml

[samuelsmiles]

Due to unfortunate circumstances, Smiles's condition has deteriorated over the last few days. He is sitting up now though, and has asked me to post this blueprint he has drawn for catching the pigeon that has so upset him lately.

 

Daphne and his Bentley are still unaccounted for.

 

[Giant Reed]

Smiles's butler,you are obviously a much loved and highly valued family retainer, and your loyalty to Smiles is to be commended.

Smiles's childish doodlings show no little invention.The man is obviously an imbecile,but he is a creative imbecile,and they are the best sort in my experience.

 

However,far be it from me to vomit copious amounts of jaundiced bile onto your latest outpouring of pathetic trivia,but i would have the tiniest globule of respect for Smiles if he stopped hiding behind the shirt tails of some tawdry backstairs Johnny butler,and faced some undeniable facts.

 

Daphne has retreated to a leper colony near Stoke on Trent.She has taken to "servicing" the lepers(well,the less choosy ones). She will not be returning,and even if she did she would probably have leprosy.

 

The Bentley is parked in Brighton,and is currently being used as a meeting place for homosexuals.By all means go and collect it,but it will probably need valeting.

 

I do hope this missive provides a much neede tonic for the ailing Smiles!

[samuelsmiles]

Reed, you utterly contemptable oaf. Your loose tongue would suggest that you are more suited to the Essex related forums. Have you considered posting on the AFC Hornchurch or Basildon 'brains trust' fora?

 

I have visited Smiles today and his nurse says he will presently be well enough to once again cross swords with the pigeon. He also handed me another "doodle" today Reed. Is this the work of an imbecile?

 

Yours,

 

Benson DuBois (butler)

 

[Giant Reed]

"HORN CHURCH"??......Hmmmmm,that does indeed sound a most accursed and blasphemous proposition!

The very idea would see one burned at the stake!!

 

Smiles's scheme is both cunning and visionary,and yet characteristically simple.

Place a shotgun where the pigeon can see it.The pigeon will be unable to resist it's natural curiousity,(as pigeons are renowned for their enquiring nature),and will be drawn to investigate.

Whereupon Smiles will leap,like a scolded [****!!****],from his concealment,and batter the unfortunate avian to death with a loaf of bread.

 

I genuinely wish Smiles well in his murderous venture.

 

However,far be it from me to spread pestilence and disease on his seedling of an idea,but I fear his plan is doomed to fail.

As something of an expert in the field of hornyfology,I have identified the bird in the drawing as a "wood" pigeon.Don't you see,Smiles,the bird is made of WOOD!

your loaf of bread will therefore disintegrate on impact,and the bird will fly away unharmed.

 

Back to the drawing board Smiles!

[buck rogers]

 

Nothing to do on sunday 2nd august then this might be for you.

 

FIRST TEAM FUND RAISER

 

THE BIG MATCH

SUNDAY 2ND AUGUST

VENUE:

HAREFIELD UNITED FC

 

HAREFIELD ALLSTARS !!

V

SOME SAD OLD GITS

 

kick off 1.00pm

 

Come along and see the stars of yester year ?

take on the young ! hares of tomorrow.

 

everyone welcome, bring your boots and some Dosh!

AND YOU COULD GET A GAME !

Ambulances will be standing by with the oxygen tanks.

 

see you all there.

 

 

[harefieldwhite]

Try not to P..s us good folk off you could fall from grace

Yo-YO

[the hare]

Looks like all the players are back for another shot at the title. only one missing and some interesting new youngsters have pushed themseves into the HARES pre season games.

 

the squad looks good, the pitch is perfect as always.

 

only one thing missing, THE TITLE

 

the gauntlet is down boys.

 

who will be fighting it out for 2ND PLACE !!!!!

[yam yam]

Originally Posted By: the hare

who will be fighting it out for 2ND PLACE !!!!!

you lot!