Taffy's Corner

[cantos]

[Bitch]

I thought i'd find Annie in here

[Miss.A.F.C.Hornchurch]

im in here now!

 

[Big J R]

I thought Taffy's corner was where he tethered his favourite sheep ???

 

[BlueGate Alan]

How very dare you

[Bitch]

In honour of Poet's Day (tomorrow, and every other Friday) we invite you to pen your little ditties in Taffy's Corner. I'm ok with little ditties, but i think Annies may be big bouncing one's

 

 

All penmanship welcome

[Bitch]

Ode to Annie, by Taffy Alan aged 99 and a half

 

CAnny Annie is right up my alley

But she prefers Janney

Woe is me, i make the tea

And want my Annie to share it with me

 

Annie Annie when will you see

There is more to me than making the tea

My hair is my own (singular)

I dont wanna be alone

So Annie come to me

We'll share a pot of rosy lee

 

 

 

 

[Miss.A.F.C.Hornchurch]

awww thats so sweet............lol!

[Bitch]

For Uncs

 

Uncle Urchin is my hero

Tolerance of moonie loonies zero

I chase him all around cyberspace

Inviting him to snog my face

 

He's got the lovely Urchinette

But she wont mind sharing i bet

We'll keep him sated with food and wine

And lots of lots of filthy times

 

Into our silkies and out just as quick

He'll throw us about and show us his tricks

And when he's finished he can get on his comp

So after 30 seconds me and Nett can continue the romp

 

[BlueGate Alan]

Apart from I am only 99 and a 1/3rd

[BlueGate Alan]

I hope you aren't writing them for all your fellas Bitch, the server would overload

[Bitch]

For Wellie

 

When we met across a crowded bar

I winked at you, you offered a jar

Mines a wine i said with glee

For you i wont charge a fee

 

Now in the mornings i leave you asleep

Go off to work without a peep

You lay in the sack and dream of what?

I come home and the bed's still hot!

 

[Bitch]

For Gussy

 

I signed you up to play for me

Took you to struggling Dorking FC

You took up your position on the pitch

Then you ran into a hitch

 

You'd gone off to work in the Bush

Couldnt make training too much of a rush

Now you are nowhere waiting for me

Where will you end up? They'll have to wait and see

 

 

[Miss.A.F.C.Hornchurch]

For Taffy (with help from Bitch!)

 

There was a guy from Margate

Who coudlnt stand Ramsgate

 

I met him early December

Oh what a day to remember...

 

He asked me what Bouncers were

So i said, you might have a heart attack Sir!

 

Gis a Bundle he cried

So i did, and poked out his eye

 

Now hes a great mate

One that i could never ever hate

And always chat on msn till late

 

 

[Bitch]

For Cantos

 

Cantos is the funniest chap

Sits with LL out on his lap

Lets me have a little stroke

While i listen to his joke

 

I've put him on a pedestal

Because he's not very tall

But with his wit he rises so

Poor LL gets vertigo

 

He upset Moo and Paula too

I wont desert him i will be true

With him and LL i feel minxy

Pulling boots on i wanna get kinky!

 

 

 

 

 

[Bitch]

For UM

 

UM is the Banter King

Suck his balls if you cross him

He gives it large and takes it too

Just ask Smallsy, Kaiser and all

 

His late night stuff is x rated

Some love it, others hate it

Give it up for the Banter King

If you dont you can kiss his ring

 

[Bitch]

I'd like to give Onebreast one

 

Onebreast is King of the Ranters

Quiet normally among the banterers

He dont like it when the lights go out

Gawd does that make him shout

 

I saw him as an xmas Elf

I think he should have a Milf

He can shout all night, rant and rave

He can even help me bathe

 

 

 

[Wellie]

"Ode to the Bitch"

 

There was a young lady from Tonbridge

Who allways drinks wine from the fridge

Bitch is her name,footy's her game

and now she's the lady that i shame

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Bitch]

For Coachie

 

Italian stallion, Albanian or Pole

I dont care cos u got soul

Never one to take the bait

Even when you're up til late

 

They dangle thier rods after a nibble

But you avoid 'em cos you're nimble

Never can it be said you take a munch

Well, only before dinner, tea, breakfast or lunch!

 

 

[Miss.A.F.C.Hornchurch]

For UM..... (short but sweet!)

 

there was once a banter king

who likes us all to sing

 

he likes to look for twitchers

while drinking his beer from a pitcher!