Ode to Ramsgate

[Pagey]

Christmas time,

Valium and wine

Children indulging in petty Crime

Dads on the smack

And mums doing a bong

Chrismas is great

When you come from newington

 

 

[Wellsie]

Classy piece there Pagey!

[BlueGate Alan]

I must admit had similar text last nite but slightly different words

 

Cliff Richard eat your heart out!

[Ian_Sanderson]

Surely Prestiage Ave,Nixon, and Coleman Cresent are a lot worse than Newington, or should we change the wording to Millmead or Dane Valley?

[BlueGate Alan]

It wouldn't rhyme then tho Ian

[Wellsie]

Touchy isn't he?

[Miss.A.F.C.Hornchurch]

classic pagey!

[BlueGate Alan]

Originally Posted By: Wellsie

Touchy isn't he?

Is he Steve, can't say I have noticed

[Ian_Sanderson]

Andy decides to have a facelift for his birthday. He spends £5,000 at The QEQM Hospital and feels really good about the result. But would others see how good he looked? So he thought he would put this to the test. On his way home, he stops off at Westwood Cross shopping centre. He first of all goes into Smiths, buys a newspaper and says to the girl behind the cash desk, "I hope you don't mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?"

"About 35," came the reply.

"I'm actually 47," Andy says, feeling really happy.

Then he goes into Debenhams for lunch and asks the waitress the same question, to which the reply is, "Oh you look about 29 ".

"I am actually 47." This makes him feel really good.

In the car park on the way out, Andy meets two elderly ladies and asks them the same question. One of them winks to the other and replies, "I can’t really tell. I am 70 years old and my eyesight is not as good as it used to be. But when I was younger, there was a sure way of telling a man’s age. If you let me put my hand down your trousers for a few minutes, I will certainly be able to tell your exact age."

As there was no one around, Andy thought why not and let her slip her hand down his trousers. Five minutes later, the lady says, "OK, it's done. I now know that you are 47."

Stunned, Andy says to her, "That was brilliant. How did you do that? "

She replies, giggling, "We were behind you in the Debenhams queue."

 

[Ian_Sanderson]

Quote "[Taffy_Alan] Sanderson is trying to be funny on our forum lol"

 

 

Sorry about that Alan

[Miss.A.F.C.Hornchurch]

[BlueGate Alan]

Don't encourage him please Annie